On the A & E Network reality show, Intervention, the addict almost always says “I'll go.” It may take 30 seconds or it may be a grueling process, but they seldom show an addict who decides they prefer to live with consequences from their loved ones instead of at least making a attempt at rehab.
The producers of Intervention have the option of simply not airing stories when the addict never gets to the “I'll go.” If it's your life, your family member, your intervention; however, there are some real world consequences that can be devastating when an intervention “fails.”
Although you'll of course need to stick with whichever consequences you set for the addict if he or she refuses to enter treatment, it's only natural that you don't want to abandon your loved one completely, especially if the addiction has reach the stage where it has become life threatening. Speak with your intervention specialist as well as a physician to find out what your options are at that point.
It's especially important to find support for yourself during this time. Family members may or may not be able to provide this level of support. The family member groups of the 12 step programs can be an excellent choice at this point. Whether it's nar-anon or al-anon or another codependents anonymous program, attending meetings can give you a chance to vent as well as meet others who are struggling with similar issues.
Planning an intervention that doesn't result in the addict immediately entering treatment can be very difficult for family members and friends of the addict. However, if you seek support for your own process and resolve to get well no matter what the addict does, in a sense you have made the intervention a success.